I haven't written about this yet, I wasn't sure if I wanted to talk about it over my blog. I am very seriously considering having bariatric surgery in November. When I say "very seriously", I have a pre-op appointment and a surgery date. This decision hasn't come to me easily and I have concerns about it but I feel it is the best option for me and I don't know what else to do.
Most of you know I've been struggling with my weight since I was about 8 years old. I've tried so many diets and until this past year have been a pretty consistent exerciser. This year has taken it's toll. I had knee surgery a year and a half ago and developed impingement syndrome in my shoulder swimming last summer. Between the knee and the shoulder and working and not sleeping and the gallbladder, I'm a mess. I just want to be able to move again.
I found a surgeon in North Carolina who performs the "mini gastric bypass". The typical bypass surgery creates a stomach pouch, then bypasses and reattaches the small intestine in two places. I'd have to draw a picture as I'm not great at explaining. There are lots of complications with that surgery, my biggest fear being you can stretch out the small pouch and end up back where you started. The "mini" instead of making a pouch divides the stomach length-wise creating a tube then bypasses part of the small intestine and reattaches it further down. There is only one new connection point and the stomach is significantly harder to stretch. Additionally, the risks are significantly decreased.
To qualify for my insurance to pay for the surgery I have had to meet with a nutritionist and my physician for 6 months, have a psychological evaluation, have a support letter written and notorized, and write personal statements. September will be my 6th month.
As I go into the final months of preparation I'm getting scared. I'm afraid my insurance won't cover it. I'm afraid it won't work. I'm afraid I'll have digestion and malnutrition problems. I'm afraid I'll have loose skin. I'm afraid I'll lose unevenly and look funny. I'm afraid.
I've talked to loads of people who have had this surgery and other gastric bypass surgeries and I've yet to have anyone say they regret it. Many have said they would do it all over again - even if they had complications. I'm still working through my fears, obviously, and while I may sound awfully scared tonight, usually I'm quite confident in my decision. I know this won't be an easy path but I'm hoping to start a new story. I want my new story to be unhindered by obesity.
Happy 5th Birthday!
12 years ago
